During rush hour, people are in more immediate need of a ride. Everybody needs a car, so the service bottlenecks completely. Not enough rideshare drivers on the road, plus traffic is terrible. Prices soar and patience often plummets. If you’re in a rush, you’re likely to order a car at an elevated rate and really expect it to be there PRONTO!
If you order a car and find that it’s too far away, you might cancel it in hopes of finding one that’s closer. But the driver you just cancelled on may have turned his car around upon getting your request. They may have gotten on or off of a freeway to start making their way to you. He or she is probably very aggravated at you right now.
One morning in particular I had three or four of these cancelled calls in a row, where I was bordering on 20 minutes of wasted time, gas, and emotional energy. I finally get a new request and get off of one freeway to hop on another headed toward my customer, Barbara. That’s when I receive a phone call from an unknown number, presumed to be my customer.
A female voice, A BRITISH FEMALE VOICE, is on the other end. She begins the niceties of how I’m doing, who she is, and why she’s calling. This of course means that this will likely not be a regular pickup without complications.
“Well, I’ll be there to meet you but I’m in a bit of a hurry.” Girl, everybody is. It’s 7:45am Calm down. “The thing is, the customer you’ll be picking up, isn’t a human…”
Really, Barbara? And what exactly will I be picking up? That giant thing from Stranger Things? E.T.? Wall-e?
“It’s our pet rabbit. He’s fallen gravely ill, I’m afraid. What you’ll be doing is picking him up in his carrier cage and taking him to the veterinarian’s office.”
Oh, that’s what I’ll be doing, is it, Barbara?
“My husband’s just popped off to work and I’ve got to take the children to school. There’s usually parking in front of the office, and if not, you can probably get away with the employee lot, since you’ll only be in there a short while.”
Oh, cool. So now I’m taking unpaid time during rush hour to handle your dying rabbit, and risking a parking ticket. Fan-freaking-tastic.
“I’ll text you the details. See you soon,” said Barbara, completely certain that this was all fine. Now comes my dilemma. Do I trust that she understands what a gaping imposition this is, and that she’ll pay me some lump sum in cash for this outlandish, ridiculous errand? I think at this point I was 0 and 1,203,538,092 sooooo… I cancelled the ride.
That’s when the texts came through, giving me the address, the veterinarian’s name, her family name, and all the details. Ending multiple texts with one huge statement that could’ve changed it all:
WE WILL PAY YOU IN CASH OBVIOUSLY FOR YOUR TROUBLES, THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Needless to say, I felt quite sheepish after reading that last one. But learn from Barbara’s cautionary tale.
RIDESHARE LESSON #386: If you have a ridiculous and complicated ride situation that requires consideration on behalf of the driver and you are going to offer a cash compensation, LEAD WITH THE FACT THAT YOU ARE OFFERING CASH COMPENSATION!
2 thoughts on ““It’s Not A Human””
After taking an Uber with you this morning I wanted to track you down online so when you next your with the moth in London I make it, and found your Uber blog which is hilarious! I mostly can’t believe the awful people! Please keep doing what your doing, your such a superstar and thank you for ending our time in LA on a high note! Hopefully I’ll see you on stage in London next time 😊
you guys made my day today! as is customary, i typically hate all my customers (as evidenced by the blog!), but you guys were super nice and so much fun. if London happens for me again, that would be incredible!